I work with two types of clients in NYC. HIgh performance clients that have been eating right and training or playing sports for most of their lives. I fine tune their diet and design training & conditioning programs that help them burn that last stubborn 5 pounds of fat and keep them strong and healthy. I also teach them mind body fitness routines to help them reduce stress. They follow the program and get awesome results. Then there is the majority of female clients I work with. In fact, the vast majority of people I meet fall into this category as well.
These clients have serious BLOCKS (mental & physical stress) that prevent weight loss: digestive problems, hormonal imbalance, brain chemistry imbalance (depression, anxiety, etc), cravings & addictions, food sensitivities (that they didn’t know about), constipated, eating disorders and thyroid issues. Some are also burned out (technically known as adrenal fatigue).
Others cant get pregnant and all of them cant lose weight no matter how hard they try.
Most of these women have been to doctors or other professionals who couldn’t figure out what was wrong with them and since MOST people in this world are sick, this category of people believe that its NORMAL to be sick, depressed, bloated, gassy, tired all day and have bad skin & PMS.
Most of these women are also trying to desperately lose weight.
But guess what?
When your not healthy, like the majority of people me and my colleagues meet, you simply cant lose weight. These underlying imbalances need to be CORRECTED first before you can lose weight. If you have those imbalances and try to lose weight, you make your life much harder and your health much worse.
I am going to write about these ‘hidden’ physical causes of stress that prevent weight loss in my next blog post.
This blog post here is about mental mistakes I see on a DAILY basis here in NYC. These are the most COMMON reasons many people can’t lose weight. Make sure you don’t make these mistakes and if you have any of those physical challenges, I will cover them in my next blog post.
1) Cause vs Effect
You don’t lose your muffin top, man boobs and get healthy by working out harder or eating less.
We live in a universe of laws, Cause and Effect is one that governs our human physiology. Being sick or overweight is an EFFECT. In order to get healthy and lose weight, you must find the CASUE and address that first.
Ask yourself WHY are you cubby to begin with?
Do you eat because your bored? Do you eat processed foods, artificial sweetener or sugar? Overdo it with coffee? Not enough sleep? Too much stress from your relationship or career? Binge eating or drinking too much alcohol on the weekends? Do you watch more TV than time exercising?
Going to the gym and dieting are the WORST things anyone can do because they don’t address the reason why the FAT is covering your abs to being with. Even if you do lose some weight, you will gain it right back untill you address the CAUSE. Find the cause and address that. The effect (weight loss) will come naturally when you do the right thing and take responsibility.
2) Denial & Defensive
Many people, men and women, young and old, are straight up weird about their bad health and irresponsible behavor.
As soon as I ask them questions they get defensive or totally deny the truth that they are unhealthy. Its strange, I know, but if you want to lose weight and haev OPTIMAL health, you need ot be honest with yourself nad others. There is a reason why people act this way, check out # 3…
3) Food Addictions
When you hear people talk about COMFORT FOODS, they are generally referring to their food addictions. CRAVINGS can also (not always) be a sign of food addiction.
I will cover this more in the next post about phsyicoal sources of stress that prevent weight loss, but MOST people have food addictions. Addictions drive brain chemistry imbalance which triggers unhealthy mental patterns (lying to self & others, denial, defensive) that prevent health & weight loss.
Sugar and artifical sweetener are very addictive and yes, very damaging to human physiology.
Gluten is a protein found in many grains and is not only damaging to the digestive and nervous system (brian function), but gluten acts as a potent opioid which is highly addictive. Casein, a protein found in dairy products, is also addictive.
If you have food addictions and are in denial about it, you will never get healthy or lose weight. If you want to get healthy, find someone who is not judgmental and who knows how to help overcome these challenges.
Why do you think MOST Americans eat cereal for breakfast every single day for 30+ years and TONS of bread, bagels, pasta and other baked goods?
Why do you suppose practically everyone FREAKS OUT when I tell them the EASIEST way to lose weight and RADICALLY IMPROVE their health is to give up these crappy processed foods????
4) Unrealistic Expectations
If you have dieted for years, or been unhealthy and eating crap for years, or been overweight and a lazy slug for 15 years – do you HONESTLY think you can lose weight for your wedding in 4 weeks??? Get real. If you have any of those imbalances I discussed earlier, you need to correct those FIRST and that TAKES TIME. If you think that an acai berry diet or following those useless leg lifts thats in EVERY women’s fitness magazines is going to change all that – you are fooling yourself.
Be honest, set realistic goals and get busy baby!
5) You Think its NORMAL to be Bloated, Sick & Depressed
This is COMMON, especially with baby boomers and seniors. Just because the people around your are taking medications and have physical pain or because depression or alcoholism runs in the family DOES NOT SENTENCE YOU TO THE SAME FATE.
Yes, most people are sick – not some, MOST, are sick & overweight in this country, but that means nothing for you and I. This brings me to the last 2 mistakes which have the greatest negative impact…
6) The Know It All
That’s right, you are coming to see me for a consultation because you cant lose weight, yet you have better ideas than me?
‘I know what works for me’, cardio for weight loss, stretching or that stupid (yet trendy) fitness class down the street is the ‘best’ thing to lose weight because ‘everyone is doing it’.
This has got to be the most annoying attitude and I see it often.
I see this with men who have not worked out or played sports since high school. I also see it with young women (usually in their mid 20’s) who have dieted for years, regularly read trendy (read: crappy) magazines and still struggle with body image, body fat and health issues.
If you have dieted, you are NOT an expert. You were a target. Dieting does NOT make you a diet expert. Dieting damages the female brain and metabolism and you likely need an EXPERT.
If you act like a Know it All, you will continue to struggle like the majority of women in this country.
If you want to lose weight and get healthy – you need guidance. We ALL need guidance in some area of life.
Most of us have accountants, lawyers, travel agents, mechanics, chefs, spiritual teachers, career mentors, tailors, etc… You see my point?
Human health, the science of safe & effective exercise programs and the physiology of weight loss requires an expert for MOST (not all) people.
So, put down the magazines, pick up a book and stop acting like a Know It All. Find a real expert and either become friends, work for them or become their client or take a class. Study everyday and you might even become a real expert at some point, if you so desire.
7) Afraid to be UNIQUE
There is a LOT of pressure to conform in American culture – every single one of us is strong enough to stand alone and not succumb to this pressure and live the life of your CHOICE, but most CHOOSE to follow the herd like good little sheep.
I do understand that there is TONS of pressure, especially for women . Guys are pressured to act ignorant and tough, but I see more pressure from more sources for women to ‘fit in’.
The problem is the ‘in crowd’ – when it comes to fitness and fat loss – is following the wrong leader and not getting results. Its more important for some people to ‘fit in’ than it is to do the right thing and GET RESULTS.
Cardio is the perfect example. Dieting, diet soda & low fat foods are others.
Eating less and exercising more is a mainstream idea embraced by the masses that doesn’t work for most (most people are not eating enough and don’t forget the underlying imbalances most people have) yet people still follow it.
Many women with the above mentioned imbalances have come to see me (or one of my colleagues that do this type of ADVANCED fitness & nutrition work) and are freaked out when we say NO CARDIO and EAT MORE FOOD.
They are afraid to do a DIFFERENT exercise and eating plan than their girlfriends and don’t understand why they can’t be normal like their girlfriends or peers who are just like they were BEFORE they got imbalanced.
You know what Im talking about dont you … starving themselves and skipping meals, drinking red bull and taking laxatives, desperately trying to lose weight by doing all the wrong things and because EVERYONE is doing it, these clients think thats what they are supposed to do.
Does that make sense?
What MOST people are doing in exercise is UNHEALTHY and INCORRECT and if you have any imbalances, following the crowd is essentially a death sentence.
ANother example is popular fitness magazines. They are very popular yet there is more confusing ideas, half truths, misinformation and conflict of interest in them than there is congruent truthful information.
In order to have OPTIMAL health, lose weight and skyrocket your energy levels as well as prevent disease, you have to love and respect yourself enough to be UNIQUE, stand out from the crowd and not be a SHEEP.
These are common mind traps that you can easily avoid. If you want to get RESULTS, you can. You need to read and study the blogs and books of real experts who are not repeating the same tired message that everyone else is repeating.
My next blog post I will cover those physical barriers to weight loss and I will also give a shout out to some real expert and friends so you know what blogs and books I encourage you to read so you get awesome results.